The tears fall …

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I stood at a graveside today. One who was deeply loved was laid to rest. The tears fell.

I sat on a piano bench. Hymns of faith and hope poured from my fingers. I willed the tears away. (It’s hard to see the music through the blur.)

I watched a life pass by in pictures. Tears leaked out again. The one who is gone should be here still.

I’ve long had a love/hate relationship with my tear ducts. To be honest, it’s mostly hate. They work too well, releasing themselves in moments when I’ve desperately wished for an OFF switch. Regardless of how I wish or hope, they have a mind of their own and the tears fall.

Tears of sorrow, the grief of a life cut short before it felt like it should be over. Tears of regret, of wishing that I had made a different choice. Tears of frustration, why can’t I learn something, why can’t I succeed. Tears of joy, of experiencing delight and being overcome.

The simplest verse in the Bible is John 11:35. “Jesus wept.” He stood at the graveside of one he loved, one he had dined with, enjoyed, taught, relaxed with and He revealed His humanness – He wept. He let the tears of sorrow flow. Knowing all of His power, He allowed the ache of loss to penetrate His soul and He wept.

That jolts me out of my loathing of my tears. The one who created me to experience the depths and range of emotions reveals Himself in His tears. His heart was broken over the loss of a friend. My heart is safe even when it breaks over the loss of a loved one. The tears should fall. He weeps with me.

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